you used to get mad at me for mentioning 'unprotected sex' and happenings in my bed
well yeah, but then i realized the wisdom of your ways.
I texted her sayin "I gotta brush my teethn then Im omw" maybe hint to do the same
I am intoxicated and cannot bring you a burrito. However, if you want to bring ME one...
mom and dad are asleep. time to fish my half-full bottle of wine out from under my bed and give this christmas visit a pick-me-up.
"half-full" seems a little optimistic for the turn your night is taking.
I researched the whole pregnancy breast feeding with piercings. I think you dont have to worry about the trifecta milk spraying thing.
His wife found out about our affair the same day he got fired for it.
You know what my problem is? I'm like a machine designed for the sole intention of removing the pants from damaged girls.
Can you please reassure him im not a scary or intimidating person? And that really my entire life is a series of completely ridiculous events that have led me here?
Don't worry I'm alive. The apt is all locked up so I'm sleeping on the patio. The frozen pizza I got might be toast unless someone lets me in soon. If not its all good I'll be here snoring on the patio
He said I gave him the best head he's ever had and I bowed. I BOWED.
The hair on my legs is officially flapping in the breeze when I walk. I must say, being single does have perks and this is one of them.
I've talked to too many cops in one week and I haven't even committed any crimes. I hate the suburbs
But really, someone with a penis give me attention before I start posting nudes on Instagram.
I think him and kristen are pretty serious now.. I dont think he cheats on her, anymore.
I cannot believe all 4 of us had sex at the same time, in the same bed... And it didn't turn into a foursome..
Randomize
