he looked about as manly as a guy in a volkswagen bug can look
Omg i either met the gayest dude ever or my next boyfriend
I should have but it might be too early in this fuckbuddyship to emasculate him
New rule : you aren't allowed anything . Ever .
My plan to masturbate 34 times on my 34th birthday backfired. Do you still have those crutches?
We are finally out of the honeymoon stage of the relationship because it turns out that you can't come back from peeing on me in your sleep.
I think our prof has caught onto our drinking game. He burst into the room with a big smile on his face and yelled "essentially! Essentially! Essentially!"
Suspicion confirmed. my mom has her nipples pierced
Way to crack the case Nancy Drew
I'm still me, I just happen to have things in my porn library that you may not have expected
Only you would come out as bi like that
I told him we could use my stove to make weed brownies, from that point on he kept reffering to me as "best pledge ever"
On another note I am sitting in my bed naked, buzzed, and working on a notecard for my 8:00am test tomorrow. I think I need to make better choices.
i like that he makes me laugh. those are like my two favorite things. laughing and fucking.
Every day I wake up and there is no spectacular morning wood waiting for me I get so sad.
Today will be the day I throw up in my backpack in the middle of class
And by "have lunch together" you mean me giving you a blow job in the back of your Tahoe, right?
Randomize
