Is it a little weird that I have a ridiculous urge to have sex while the theme song to the Pirates of the Carrbibbean blares in the background?
Wow, So this kid just walked into class, yak'd on his lab partner then runs out. Class is now cancelled. I gotta find this kid and Thank him.
i was trying to find the best way to say come over and have sex, without saying it.
thanks for celebrating my birthday so severely 2 years ago. i just found your hospital discharge papers in my closet.
anything for my little brother.
She licked EVERYTHING then yelled at me in Spanish. I just kept saying SI.
dude when im high using logic is an accomplishment that should be rewarded. make sure u get cinnamon twists
I'm totally wasted about to ride water slides. That's goddamn 'Merican. That and Clint Eastwood.
The next time you try to drunkenly strip me in public let's make sure it's not anywhere near the daiquiri factory or a group of police officers.
I desperately wanted to wear your shirt.
This girl braided my pubes while i was asleep. Now i cant get them undone.
Question. There's no better feeling than clean shaven balls. Do girls get that too?
The amount of times I have been emergency drunk in the past 72 hours is staggering
Let's be honest dude, you almost cried when I gave you a handy, you are not ready for a relationship, I knew this.
If I'm walking weird, don't judge me. Things got kinda outta hand with the GoPro on.
false alarm, still single
I would let him fuck me right here in this laundromat. Praise Satan.
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