I have to decide between the hot young blond with no apparent gag reflex, and the brunette with a great ass and a trust fund.
Tittie bar + Mother In law gone = mission accomplished.
I am not deleting the internet history anymore, now I am going for shock value.
He fucked a visibly pregnant girl. It doesn't get weirder than that.
That was a $3000 rug we rolled him down the hill in.
Stripper pole. Sore legs. More vaca money.
we found him. outside on the balcony, sitting on a bucket, with his pants off, swearing he was'nt taking a dump
Then this bride walked into the bar, she thought it would be a good idea to hug her & then she started playing parachute with her train.
This is three metal detector wands away from being the strangest porn I have ever been in the audience for.
You can't spell "party" without "RA."
You know what else you can't spell it without? "Gonna get fired."
You know you are 86'd from the legacy right? You can't down shots then spike the shot glass
So note to self oboe reeds soaked in Apple Rubinoff sound GREAT.
If you've never been partying there before, take Shae with you. Drunk Shae is like a GPS. She found us the only bottle shop still open at four, a pot dealer, and told us all which subway to take to get home. She'd never been to Madrid before. It was awesome.
Weddings might be fun but they are not getting fucked in the wilderness fun.
Fuck it, I'm going to make my own dick pic album since iOS 10 won't do it for me.
Randomize
