I have to tell you about my conversation with the cloud dragon!
ppl dont tell me stories about anal. apparently im not a tell-me-stories-about-anal kind of person
Life lesson: using the oven as a heater= $500 electric bill
there's only 1 girl at Mount St Mary that's a virgin. the Mary statue standing outside
New Jersey isn't a real state, it's just a myth you tell little kids to scare them like Canada or Carrot Top
She had a maple leaf tattoo behind her ear and told me she liked my "playoff beard".
Only in Canada would your laziness be applied to hockey and rewarded.
Don't you hate it when all three people suddenly sober up in the middle of a threesome. Awwwwkward.
I just smoked pot in front of my old Elementary School. It's like my Childhood and Adulthood are coming together in this awesome thing.
Don't worry, nothing happened....but we should have a fire extinguisher here.
It's a sign that no dudes december is about to start: I have a yeast infection.
maybe these stereotypes wouldn't come up if you would stop taking body shots off another
it is a dangerous dangerous place where morals and dignity go to die and all your fantasies about men become reality.
I think we can say happy hour is successful when you have frosting and southern comfort in your hair.
I made out with him in the club and he endorsed me on Linkedin. My networking skills are off the charts.
So apparently I fell asleep sitting on the toilet last night while my drunk girlfriend sang to me.
Randomize
