I woke up this morning with I hate myself feeling
I wonder if you could grow some weed in a chia pet
I just looked at the maps icon on my IPhone and "eR" was typed in the search address bar. I wonder if we ever got there.
I think I breastfed the cat at some point during the night, at least that's what my nipples are saying
so when he was about to cum, he screamed his mother's name and continued to pray for forgiveness. wtf
noooo, I woke up on his pack porch and the SUN WAS RISING. I saw red lights everywhere and heard sirens so I just ran for my life.
Is it mean that I just sent him a pic of my tits with the header, "say bye bye?"
We have been pregaming the shutdown of the government since Tuesday. Send help, and some more liquor.
I want to let you in on my two latest life goals. Have a photograph of me squirting whipped cream into a midget's mouth, and have sex on a roof.
The reality is I'm 24 and I have terminal breast cancer. Fuck yeah I'm going have sex with every hot guy I can. What, am I gonna worry about getting an STD or pregnant at this point? If I'm gonna die, I want to have any many big dicks as I can while I'm still able.
Just read 119 best sex positions. I wanna try 107 of them. Can I put you down for 50?
Oh dear God, they have a song about Mom...
Free stuff before I even put his balls in my mouth like wow great start
After we'd both come, we started writing a book about dragons. Woke up this morning to a full English breakfast. Can't thank you enough for introducing us
We were driving past a farm when he screamed at me to stop the car, then he jumped out and tried to ride a cow.
Randomize
