she just gave her compliments to the chief, at dennys
The extent of my physical activity is running from the cops.
You really need to get over the whole "jail" thing. Its really not that bad.
There is no way that a naked man in your kitchen can be explained-away as a "misunderstanding."
He can spot Burberry from half a bar away. He's not into vag
He came for an unexpected visit and let's just say I shattered his illusion that girls don't watch porn
I can already see the regret in her eyes. Amazing night. This city rules.
its just been over 12 hours, and i`m dying, don`t know how i`m supposed to survive the holidays sexless
We laughed. We cried. We came everywhere.
thank you for extending my knowledge of the effects of vodka. speak of what happened last night and i will kill you and send your fingers to your loved ones.
I mean metaphorically speaking, maybe we've all fucked on top of a frat house at some point in our lives
I want to get a list going called "D list celebs I've kissed"
And I mean really who loses their phone in a tree
like I'd leave you in a situation like that..pfft. what kinda friend do you think I am?
...a stoned one.
i’n just gonna forge ahead, gag reflex be DAMNED.
Randomize
