ill give you a foot job if you come over before 4
The new Black Eyed Peas song is the stupidest shit I've heard since the last Black Eyed Peas song.
i have a food baby... i think its a boy...
consequently i now know what mace tastes like
my dad's beating me at drinking again. No matter what i do I can't win.
just passed out again, this time at a subway. On a positive not they gave me a free sandwich, pretty sure out pity but at this point i don't care
If you like her enough, bring her with. If not, eloquently cunt punt that bitch through the field goals of life.
She said " I'm going to get her back one day soon for putting extacy in my pop while I drove her to whislter" just a heads up.
I'm doing somethin that's never been done before...the 10 am booty call come over
Well if I'm going to hook up with every ethnicity by the end of undergrad, I need to be moving on
Boob shaped ice luge is ordered for my bday. Boom
I can't even drink.
The liquor comes out the nipples. Out. The. Nipples.
dude, where are you? this beer run has taken so long i read war and peace, took a nap, and shaved 3 times.
I don't know about this Sanders guy after all. I'm voting for MYSTERY BABYLON, WHORE OF ALL THE EARTH
Hillary?
fuck school, let's just become the worst strippers ever
Where'd you go?
Laundry, im. A responsible drunk
Randomize
