you can still come hang out if you want
I really don't feel like watching you play video games
im eating kix cereal and taking shots by myself. please come hang out with me. im desperate
We talked him into tasing himself.
I have just figured that it takes exactly 2 and a half rums to clean the bathroom..
Just hook me up with your dad already stop being selfish
you know it's gonna be a good 4/20 when you start saving up for it in january.
I think she's perpetually drunk
It's all she knows
P.s. remind me to tell you about the porno that Paul envisioned starring you. It's wizard of oz themed.
And your cousins porn shouldn't have been the first straight porn you watched. And for that I am sorry
Aaaaand my mom is wearing jeggings...
He staggered in with his pants around his ankles and yelled that he lost his pants
My hungover walk of shame was interrupted by a stranger on a balcony throwing me a beer to shotgun... at 10 a.m....
he force fed me pizza, ripped my clothes off, almost broke the couch, and actually broke my nose. it was a good night, i'd say 😂
Goal: finish my bio assignment before the Xanax kicks in.
Your parents are gone and we haven't fucked in their bed... why?
Randomize
