who let me buy 6 packs of big league chew? and eat them all? thats not cool
After she threw up on my floor she started singing "this is why I'm hot."
I remember why I come home for the holidays. Sam Adams is the cheapest beer in the fridge
The streak lives on, still havent been to Towson without throwing up
Drunk and had dance off with 8 year old. Lost. Still drinking
The guy i fucked last week got done first on the test in my 900 person class. If im pregnant at least it will be smart.
You tipped the bathroom lady $20 and then yelled "IT'S YOUR LUCKY DAAAAAAAY" at her.
Night out in new white coat = success. Offered free breast exams all night, two took me up on it, woke up with one. I love medical school!!!
I don't want to talk. I just want to motorboat those tits
I bruised my vagina when I was climbing out of the trash can.
yes and no. im drunk but idk if im "blow marcus" drunk. call in like an hour.
So he just rolled you off his dick and fell on the floor?
We have a lot of substance abuse to do tomorrow its sleep time
like I licked Molly off a boys palm last night at a bar I think its ok to eat chicken once a week
He just compared fucking my vagina to a snow flake falling on his forehead: gentle.... I'm not sure if that's a compliment or not.
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