Kirsten Dunst is sitting next to me in a bar in NYC
Tell her I want my money back for Elizabethtown.
Can you send me a pic of you vag, I'm sexting the guy and he wants a pic but I didnt shave
dude are you serious?
I know you already have a pic on your phone
so how much must it suck for him to know that the penis of his best man has been in his wife's mouth before?
At what point are you a chubby chaser or just desperate for sex?
just to let ya know we might have to take a stripper snowboardin sometime
I don't think my arm is broken I can still text
God my Facebook chat is a graveyard of old blowjobz
She was trying to fuck the exchange student from France. His English is really bad and the music was loud so she just pointed to a beer bottle and then her vagina.
can you please explain how one drink turns into 5 street signs with their poles lying around my room
I'm gonna get drunk in the shower and yell at my parents during dinner. Have fun in Texas.
Look, sometimes you have to snapchat a topless photo of yourself in the middle of class just to prove you can. I can and I did. End of argument.
I know him enough to fuck him but not enough to give him advice.
I will run into the sunset with a fist full of condoms.
Hey, before I head out, whats your policy on casual drug use and one night stands?
I got wing sauce on the baby and licked it off. If you were wondering how I'm doing.
Randomize
