Hahaha, sighhhh...I texted him to no response. It's a shame, really...I would gladly exchange my body for pizza rills.
my phone is set on vibrate and its tucked up in my left front pocket. call me back 20 times real quick.
Tampa is so boring. I'm dying. I want lots of cleavage at my funeral. If i cant get laid, i want my friends to. I'm that kind of person
so last night after we hooked up i got my period and woke up this morning with a blood stain on his bed and not only was it huge but i had put my jeans back on before bed so i took the walk of shame with period stained pants
Its like im going on a blind date, but ive already had sex with her
in the practice room. just found 3 bottles of smirnoff hidden inside the piano. SO glad i didn't get into berklee...
I mean, we do coke and have sex occasionally...I wouldn't call that a relationship.
Tommorow.Eggs Benedict and surprise blowjob day
I know. But whatever I'll just eat cold pizza and play with my cats by candlelight
I just looked into the eyes of the man whose car I peed on last night
Is valentines day the worst or best day to ask for a threesome? I'm weighing some options on this high-risk manoeuvre.
I just watched in amazement as you had a full conversation about water temperature and bacteria with your pet goldfish.
Muscle is literally tearing itself off of my shins. No I am not going on another bar crawl with you.
I'll pay?
Pick me up at 9.
No, gay couples have the same problems straight ones do; I wish that we could go back to the days when he would shit with the door closed.
You told everyone to shut up then told the officer that you are 21 when you drink.
Randomize
