Just saw someone buying TWO six packs of O'Doul's. WHY ??
Pregaming for shuffle board at 10 AM. I love spring break.
You walked away saying that you had to pee and you never came back. We found you an hour later in his roommate's bed. Under the covers. Still in your wet bathing suit.
I will start puting down the plastic for the vom in our love chamber. If you want to be something or someone else for the night feel free. The theme is shit show.
I'm there.
my roommate just showed me the scar on her forehead... that she got from a shake weight... That. just. happened.
Bring condoms and burritos. The rest will fall into place
Wait also totally unrelated but can horses sit down?
I just tried to picture one and I don't think they can cause I can't envision it
Drunk naked twister. My place. Heath is trying to use his dick as a third leg.
All i remember is you yelling at a stop sign and the rest is a blur
sitting in the kitchen naked and eating stirfry, random dude left my room saying thanks and gave me a bottle of wine. explain...
This is ridiculous. I’m in fucking college getting high off a potato.
You must be buzzed on Miller Lite.. Zen master advice is flowing
She put a shot in my mouth and then hit me with a pillow..
I woke up with my earring stuck inbetween my tits. Somehow you fucked my earring out and my boobs saved it. I'm pretty impressed with both of us right now.
You have thirteen minutes to get here if you want to get back together. Otherwise I'm getting digits from the waitress.
Randomize
