ad ew i am wasted whats my problem
Yeah, we spent most of the evening making fun of the drunk girl until we realized it was you.
I walked outside out to find her peeing in her toga with a cigar in one hand and her thong in the other
i take my contacts out every time we fuck so i cant see all the stretch marks
He just lit his joint with the tiki torches around his pool. He is definitely coming to my future parties
I mean Grimace is basically just a big piece of purple shit and he is loved way more than the hamburglar just to put it into perspective
By the power invested in me, I now pronounce your taco to be meaty. Meaty taco meaty taco meaty meaty meaty taco.
Dude next time u fuck on our counters will u please let me know BEFORE I make lunch.
And don't worry, my exact words were "I can't believe a baby came outta that thing"
I have never encountered a chode in the wild
I am going to paint butt plugs like little Christmas trees and give them as gifts.
You could paint cock rings as wreaths.
Feel weird saying this on Facebook, but a dildo collecting demigod sounds like somebody I'd at least hang with for a minute.
I just need to find someone whose kink is financial submission.
At one point she put on my dads pants and yelled after him EMILIOOOO! Dude, my dads name is Mark.
Pillow talk was a high five, this morning she made dinosaur muffins for the house. I love chapel hill
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