So J keeps drinking his last bit of drink, then spitting it out and drinks it again. Savor the flavor?
Also pencil in smooth jazz and illegal activities. The usual.
I think i can make this amish girl legitimately hot.
i'm sitting pantsless eating potato chips and watching porn before he picks me up for our date. I hope he's ready for this...
I can't help but be optimistic. I'm like a ball of slutty sunshine.
I feel like fucking him is something we all do but don't want to admit to. like masturbating or peeing in the shower
We attempted to microwave fifteen corndogs in the microwave and may have ruined it. Also there were fake mustaches on all of his appliances...he said he doesn't like drunk me.
I told him he could fuck me once he could grow a beard. Never expected seeing him ten years later with a goatee and a great memory...
I got drunk and tried to make special rice krispie treats, but I made a mess and they were all stuck to my hands, so I just decided to eat my way out of the catastrophe and I think shit's about to get even weirder than usual.
Sarah was butt-chugging wine and diarrhea'd all over the wall
You think your roommate is bad? The guy they paired me with is such a nerd, his very presence at a party blocks every cock in the room.
But what if there are 6 people and they end up just pairing the off into 3 couples. Is it still an orgy?
Its weird to introduce me to his wife and kids on the first date, right?
I’m getting reeeeaaalll tired of telling cute boys I gave them chlamydia.
That’s two in three months. You really know how to live.
The longer the dick, the closer to Jesus when you’re on top.
Randomize