They have glow in the dark condoms. That's so scary.
Something like a penis light saber.
you know whats weird about having a girlfriend....I look forward to masturbating now....sort of like quality me time.
Fist pumping is hard when country music is playing FYI but I am committed
I just peeled a layer of cum off my eyelid. Don't even tell me that's not why you came over
My alcohol tolerance is way too high for this paycheck.
i was wearing footie pjs. how could there be confusion as to who i hooked up with, thats not something you forget
I don't think he knows what shame means anymore. He gave some bar slut his sisters Tiffanys necklace, in exchange for anal.
The moment you ate chicken nuggets out of your purse you were my hero.
Where the hell did i get chicken nuggets from
it's not like this is the first time she's brought a guy home and I'm the one who hooks up with him
Based off the amount of cat hair on my poncho....i stole a cat last night.
all i remember is walking in on u shitting and crying listening to shawty get loose. its safe to say this break up has taken a toll on u
he wouldnt let me in bed until i took off all the stickers i was covered in
Hopefully this dress says "let me rent your house" and not "let me suck your dick for money"
You're an independent woman who is defined by her own actions and not by whether or not you have a man. You also have great tits.
Our sex from this weekend should be engraved into a plaque or commemorated somehow. It was fucking amazing.
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