I'm worried someone is gonna take a black light to my work computer. But the connection is faster here.
Is my tampon string too long for this dress?
I don't care how bad it tastes, i just put it in my mouth and deal with it
I finally got laid.. you said it wouldn't happen.
A kid wearing a Batman belt buckle in my psych class just asked how people get pee fetishes. I'm too high for this.
I just got a booty call..Its 6 pm..a brave attempt to climb the rotation ladder..I like his ambition.
She didn't even ask about the dinosaur pinata in my trunk. Like at this point I think these are the things she expects from me
She was our DD the least I could do is have sex with her. Even when drunk I'm still chivalrous.
Drunk you is everything I aspire to be in life.
You made everyone who was on the patio sit on the floor and join your "ship" because you were the Captain. It was cool though. You let me be your 1st Mate.
No, I don't think your idea of offering shots in exchange for bonus points to your history professor at B-Dubs was a good idea. Especially after you later told him that you would "tap that" in regards to his wife.
I'm going to fuck every single member of the men's olympic swimming team and no one is going to stop me
We peed together in a dark alley while holding hands. That is a bond that can never be broken.
Like its not even midnight and I've already had enough of her for all of 2015
I'm the one who said we should take things slow. I'm also the one who forced him into the back on my car so we could have sex.
Randomize
