let's have our labels/stereotypes/careers for each kid by next week.
oh how i love working at summer camp.
And no, shaving doesn't make it look bigger, either
this kid at 40 friday greeted another kid by saying "heeey farmville neighbor"
dude.
yep. needless to say i didn't meet anyone and spent yet another friday night masturbating.
Dude, a dry wedding reception should nullify the vows, because really, without the booze, you might as well be 5 years old again and playing dress-up
we had a 10 minute conversation with his family about how I don't let him eat me out. I want to go home
she has a picture of her daughter riding a giant rooster.. of course i want to make obscene cock jokes
THERE IS PRACTICALLY A BEER FUCKING WATERFALL
It's been so long since i rode in a trunk. I'm riding in a trunk btw
I'm drinking sangria out of a sand pail. I'll pass on tonight
Well who could blame her. I would run away from me if I could.
I peed sitting down because I knew standing was a lost cause
Until you have had Country Grammar stuck in your head whilst writing a Supreme Court brief you've never lived.
BILL GATES DONALD TRUMP LET ME IN NOW
My frontal lobe is being piloted by Jack Daniels right now.
He walked into the bar with a pillow and put his head down...nuff said
He was a half hour late. His excuse was that his brother knifed him right before he was going to leave. I didn't believe him until I saw the gauze.
Randomize
