I developed a drinking game for WoW. Everytime I die, I take a shot.
Please get laid.
I'm sorry but when I'm riding in the trunk on the way to mcdonalds at 6 am I just don't want to listen to reba macintire
Tequila bombs in champagne seemed like a good idea at the time.
When they arrested me, they gave me a bracelet with my mugshot and info. When you get one they can be our BFF Bracelets.
I wanna get freshman fucked up and do shady things on the last Friday of my youth.
Dude. Yeah. This is a game changer. I feel dirty and possibly pregnant and it hasn't happened yet.
I'm pretty sure I'm the first person in the history of this college to rollerblade their walk of shame.
I guess I've just seen a lot of penises since then
Hey, if I can't get it and you're still alive, can you get the glass out of my foot? Happy Sunday.
When you can pee with one hand accurately while texting, you drink too much.
Next time someone asks you what your spirit animal is do you really want to answer the iowa state fair butter cow?
Are we on the same shift tomorrow and more importantly do you want your pants back?
I will never look at a penis the same again. After that I will appreciate them so much more than I do. Makes me wanna kiss yours just for being pretty
Take a shit and have a hit. It's the Sunday Funday Rule.
YOUR VAGINA IS SO CUTE IT'S LIKE A LITTLE MACAROON
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