I googled "I hate my uterus" just to make sure I wasn't the only one.
if someoen knew that someone accidentally drunkly kissed your boyfriend would you want them to tell you/?
followup question: what if both somones were me?
in hindsight, drinking 2 bottles of wine probably wasnt going to put me in an optimal position for a job interview
You don't understand, Single Ladies is like the Don't Stop Believing of the gay community.
Just found out I slapped a vegan in the face with meat last night.
Somehow I gave him blood blisters on his dick...I don't know if I'm that good or that bad.
We removed her tutu and her cape, so there's no risk of her strangling herself.
I take your lack of response to mean that your hands are taped to 40 ounces of something.
Text me when you wake up so I know you're ok. It's really worrisome to get home at this hour and find 3 men passed out in my room but no you. Love you, goodnight. :-)
When we were eating pie last night, I dropped some, and not only did you not judge me for far surpassing the 5 second rule, you let me use your foot to sock mop with. You're a good friend.
So many Oreos I'm regretting this decision already but I'm happy at the same time...The straddle is real
Struggle. Not straddle. I'm not straddling anyone.
Fuck you, I'm yelling at a mountain right now
I'm gonna chug this bud light an might injure this high school penis, like I'm 17 again
Is it normal for a guy to send you a dick pic along with “He misses you”
its Niagara falls. its like international waters. You can get away with anything there
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