so then you didnt wanna fuck tonight right?
oops, you werent supposed to get that until you left.
Im watching he's just not that into you, eating way too much pizza, and feeling very single.
I have a very awkward question for you. Could you possibly take my black dildo. My mom wants to clean my room.
sunday morning discovery: something purple, smelly, and sticky my hair. any suggestions?
is it normal that we went to that class once and both got 100's on the final? ohhhh, arizona state.
Any little, cute, petite blondes with you?
Nah, I got some slutty brunettes though.
I've done unspeakable things to your penis. I have every right to give it a name.
Last time I saw him the sun was coming up and he was asleep in the student wellness parking lot. For some reason people were peeing on him.
Just charged fat mistake $3 for a beer.
U know that drunk state, where at 930 the next morning your sitting in a bath in ur bathing suit trying to sober up...yeah. That's where i am..
Check the mailbox while you're out!
I already looked this morning. You go check and see what you won on Ebay after your day drinking spree.
THIS IS NOT A DECISION I MADE AT ONE IN THE MORNING IM JUST GETTING AROUND TO TELLING YOU ABOUT IT NOW
One singular head for man, one giant climax for mankind
Why would you get kicked out?
Well, an overweight man is currently not wearing a shirt. Or pants. And is getting in touch with his inner Chippendale. You can probably fill in the blanks.
VIVE LA RESISTANCE
Oh god, what now?
Randomize