She got kicked off the plane and spent the last four hours in a holding cell with the feds.
but she's really nice
I just want you to know that me val and amanda are drinking on top of a hill lookig at the chicago skyline drinking icehouse and we just peed in public.
So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
i called her out for picking her nose in public and he still wonders why i don't like her!
Just spent 3 hours on the Mcdonalds website. I don't know what to do with myself now that college is over.
Stumbled into class and into a desk. When I fell my bottle broke in my backpack. I had to leave there was vodka everywhere.
they're both probably 7 inches? or 8? I'm shoving a ruler in my mouth trying to figure it out
I was tied up in bed before noon, the rest of the day can go to hell.
just had sex on top of a camper looking at the stars, BEAT THAT.
I cannot describe the pre-ejaculative horrors thru the medium of text messaging
I was trying to fart in my sleep in the hopes that he would leave
You were mean to me and you broke my heart and hurt my feelings. You dont get to talk to me about Peter Dinklage
Nah it's alright, I'll just ride cock all the way to hell
not that im pissed, but why are there two naked chicks in my bed?
Woke up next to my vibrator and a recipe for fudge brownies. If that doesn't scream I NEED TO GET LAID, then I don't know what else could.
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