I've been watching too much manswers. Cuz i know scissoring doesn't work on a motorcycle.
You know, be my cock's hype man.
So would it be tacky to offer my services as a future attorney as an engagement gift for her?
"Clean/organize my room day" turned into "Blast my old Jock Jams cds while getting high as fuck with a strobe light day"
These welts and bruises from letting gay boys whip my thighs last night are a clear indication i should lay off the tequila.
he congratulated me on my ability to grow long hair after pulling it to see if i had extensions
Out of control sex drive for a girl? I just masturbated in the bathroom at my in-laws house before dinner....
STOP SETTING ME UP WITH GUYS YOU MEET ON CRAIGSLIST
Worst walk of shame man. They had a fire drill at 7am, had to walk out of her all girl dorm wearing my Everday I'm Hustling sweater
You could woo kevin with a boquet of breakfast burritos. He loves those burritos. You could use the hot sauce packets like babies breathe
Um went out in San Francisco last night and ignored someone hitting on me. So they bit my arm. Lmfao PLEASE TELL ME THIS ISNT THE SINGLE LIFE
She was wearing American flag underwear. How could I NOT fuck her?
You're a true patriot.
Did my extra credit for a class I badly need to pass at the bar of Friday's.. kind of sum's up my college career. Got a 90 though.
He totally fucked me in his Chewbacca socks
Last time I had a one night stand he ended up stalking me for two months.
So you're not picking up this weekend?
This weekend, I am Angela, visiting from Calgary. We'll have to roleplay this.
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