You kept excitedly announcing to the bar what time it was. Followed by an equally excited "Clock language still makes sense!"
"Guy Time" translaed into 10 shots apiece and me waking up covered in my own blood.
For a limited time only, free special muffin with the referral of a loyal dro customer! Have it for breakfast and be happy off your ass all day! Guaranteed! New member must buy at least an eighth. Oh and O's are on sale for 280.
You. Win. At. Life.
Lost my virginity in a banana suit. Glad I waited.
I feel like all of the victims from Seven. Best birthday weekend ever.
you're the one asking for my vibrator at 4 in the morning so reconsider your life
You're cock blocking me from my own boyfriend. What kind of shit is that?
Couldn't find my swimsuit top anywhere this morning but finally found it in the skimmer of the pool so thats how my night apparently went
I'm tryin a pb and onion sandwich now
Please smoke with me until I agree that sounds like a good idea
I mayyyyy have moaned a name that wasn't his
She helped me out of the car and i face planted into the snow.....and just stayed there and took like a 30 min nap.
A drunk and bleeding peter is knocking on your door... in nothing more than a sombrero, boxers and cowboy boots.
Basically we had a threesome in one room and a fivesome in the next room. Its what I like to call a win win situation.
Holy. Shit. I just remembered all the lapdances....
I was peer pressured into smoking weed by a bunch of LGBTQ teenagers
Randomize
