i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
what?
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
I was just about to go down on her when she gave herself a "smell check" and said "no, not today".
hahhahahha. mid doggie-style, i faked an asthma attack. the sex was that bad
i called my brother from the living room and paid him a dollar to turn off the light in my room. ive hit rock bottom
Just got blown on the bus in front of abot 20 ppl. Lots of high fives.
You were petting your shoe and saying this makes me really happy
i don't understand how she was down there for so long, she's like a mermaid, a blowjob giving mermaid.
Two dudes got up on top of the pianos and danced shirtless. They didnt even get kicked out. I love vegas
Don't make it weird, I don't think about you when I'm climaxing, it's just that I see you rooting me on.
We fucked to showtunes. Never going out with a theatre major ever again.
Two questions. One. Where are you watching election results tomorrow? Two. Can we have Obama victory sex?
Fun fact. I am at the police dept. getting served a warrant for unpaid ordinance... and the officer was a one night stand from like 10 years ago.
I sang him a lovely rendition of 'So Long and Thanks For All the Fish", but replaced fish with dick.
seriously, who doesn't want to get shitfaced and have sex to the backstreet boys?
When he wakes up tomorrow with half shaved legs smelling like a preteens bathroom, I'm sure he will think he has had a great evening
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