You hook up with other guys, let him talk to other girls.
no
Is it possible to jerk off a nipple?
he was CRYING into my vagina
the tow truck driver and i bonded while discussing our experiences with four lokos
Tried to eat a chip. Mouth wouldn't cooperate. Nearly died. Wow I've missed this.
we used the fire extinguisher you had been cuddling with to decorate the cop car while they were inside arresting everyone
I WILL PAPERCUT YOUR URETHRA YOU DO NOT STEAL A MANS SECOND BIG MAC
I tried to find the bar, ended up at a car dealership. Then the alarms went off.
Are you still going to come over for your post Alcoholics Anonymous beer?
I think I have to break up with him. I just cried, not moaned, screamed, etc, cried, with tears of sadness and disappointment when I came.
she dared me to make out with the amish dude so I went up to him and grabbed him by the beard
GRABBED HIM BY THE BEARD
All I know, is I had green sex and beer and got driven home. That's it.
Its a holy bong. We had to bless the holy bong water.
If you can't accept me drawing a Santa hat on your penis then we can't be friends
He said my vagina is harder to escape than the Temple of Doom.
Randomize