At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
you told everyone your name was brenda and you had the whole party chanting b-dawgg by the end of the night. successful.
TLC. RIGHT NOW. PRIMORDIAL TODDLERS.
my one-armed grandma is doing the YMCA. you figure it out.
I take back everything I said about communal showers
i was like his sober eyes girls would come up to us, show us theirs and if approved by me blew him, if rejected they went to my truck with a bottle of patron
I would convert to being a Republican and Mormon just to sleep with Romney's sons. The things I would to do them.
It's one of those nights that you wish to god someone would booty call you, and then realize you'll just be stuck here with your poptart...
Nothing says I've got my life together like vomiting on the groom and passing out at your youngests sisters wedding
I can taunt you with whatever I want. Like batman and sex.
I think the solution to your phobia is an open relationship with your dildo. about the same responsibility as a pet rock
you got drunk, told him he looked like shaggy and said 'I wouldn't show you my mystery machine for all the scooby snacks in the world'
I don't have any plans for New Year's except watching anime and drinking until I can't read the subtitles anymore.
Trust me, I'm a professional lesbian.
Her dad had just brought down their giant American flag for 4th of July and we fucked on it. I have never been more patriotic
Randomize
