Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

Sorry Jrod23 hasn't picked any favorites yet.

ADVERTISEMENT

(310): View more from California

I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.

Fav 7 2526 829
share tweet
(321): View more from Florida Space Coast

Question. If Kwik Trip and Kum and Go were to merge, what would they call it? Kwik Kum or Kum Kwik?

Fav 41 3441 821
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(520): View more from Arizona

The world would be so much better with thought bubbles.

Fav 9 5534 918
share tweet
(607): View more from New York

people should stop making movies, we'll never top bio-dome.

Fav 32 3879 1263
share tweet
(610): View more from Pennsylvania

He sang nursery rhymes to my vagina to get me to have sex with him..

Fav 10 1701 3908
share tweet
(856): View more from New Jersey

When I told her that her boyfriend was making out with another chick, all she said was "which one"

Fav 11 3155 1509
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(321): View more from Florida Space Coast

Ive made peace with the fact that i will accomplish nothing except liver damage today

Fav 2 2510 1299
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(708): View more from Illinois

You ran down the alley towards a stranger screaming "you took my beer".... Then proceeded to run into a garage, fall down, and scream about how your shirt makes you look fat.

Fav 1 653 787
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(224): View more from Illinois

And then you two got up and shouted in near perfect unison "I'M ALWAYS A SLUT FOR BASKIN ROBBINS" The bar just looked at us horrified.

Fav 2 353 112
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT