I am currently prioritizing my hw by splitting into things i can and things i cant do drunk. Oh college
i told him my stretch marks were scars from a jellyfish sting........he totally bought it
Should study in library more often, procrasturbating is less of an option.
Wednesday. Otherwise known, to you at least, as "there are two gay men in my bed" day.
woke up this morning in the hall outside of my parents room with a sign taped to myself that said "im sorry"...
My suggestion that we all just smoke some weed was greeted with a uncomfrotable silence and a 'maybe later'. These are not our people
While we were making out, he kept yelling at me for not coming to his wedding last month.
Kyle's mobile fuck service..... Kinda has a nice ring to it don't you think??
The words "me," "sober," and "new years eve" do not go together. Ever.
Have you had sex with a man from New Zealand? No? Then your input is invalid.
But of course I'm in. After all, what fun would the holidays be without trying to find the perfect gift to impress someone you've never met, but need the approval of??
Well I got black out drunk before the rehearsal dinner and berated my family with insults. But other then that it was a good time
thought i saw a dude in a kilt yesterday, but then i realized he was doing a walk of shame. happy st. paddy's day.
last night is slowly putting itself back together. Its one giant slutty puzzle, all the pieces are covered in tequila and shame.
You know that tattoo place next to Dallas? The naked sexy frog on my neck is proof that their "won't tattoo if drunk" sign is bullshit!
Randomize
