Hello, balls-out mistake. It's been a while.
I think he may have called me a bar rat, jokingly. I said i was but in a non-trashy way.
Def ran into my elementary school babysitter at the grocery store. Still hot. And she complimented my beer choice. It feels good to still have her approval
I've had cake for breakfast the past 3 days. You tell me how bikini season is going.
Ummm I just broke my no puke streak at church
God my Facebook chat is a graveyard of old blowjobz
i dont know what was worse.. snorting the wasabi or puking on the neighbors dog
Why is there an ambulance refusal in my pocket? I'm never going drinking with you again.
Imagine Captain Hook, but in penis form and sometimes shy.
I am seriously thinking about wearing a blanket as a cape. So when I pass out tonight the blanket might keep me warm.
Dude, did you fall in a toilet on the way over here?
Was face down in one actually. Bars 2, Drew 0.
Getting drunk and falling down, isnt the best way to describe your hobbies, to your new co-workers.
getting busted for public urination is like, a step above j-walking. you'll be fine
I miss the days where our biggest worries were who was gonna win battle shits.
I just walked in on Joel doing a buck naked tripod headstand in front of the mirror so he could see the bug bite on his balls
Randomize
