You don't need id to drink rum in an alley.
i cant wait for all this BS that is happening with Tiger to happen to Tebow
Just lit a joint with steel wool and a 9 volt battery... thank you 3rd grade science class
If I am going to throw out this whole "born again virgin" thing...i'm not going to do it on someone who is less than 5 inches.
Aaaaand that would be the most of my hand I've ever fit into a vagina before.
You drink it until you puke in a vent one time and it's ruined forever.
So this whole chlamydia situation totally puts a damper on my back to school sex schedule, there's just no way of knowing who of them was the perpetrator... Time for new candidates
this hangover isn't hhappening. im not letting it
its winning. its definitely happening
I need a genital shamwow being this wet.
You said "this is only my eighth drink" with like 6 separate drinks
I fucked R2D2 last night. I consider Star Wars day a success.
I feel like my liver should be on crutches right now
I got a discount on the lube for giving the cashier focaccia bread from work.
I literally forgot every French word I knew and blurted out “mange moi” so he went down on me like I was some baguette fresh outta the oven!!!! I passed out.
So how do u get your coat out of the coat room when someone is fucking on it?
Randomize
