the boy next to me on the plane handed me a shot glass, then a perkaset, and told me to have a good week off..hellllo spring break.
Fucking freshmen need to learn how to puke in the bushes outside the dorm and not in the fucking elevator.
Just saw a crackhead get taken down by pd in the canal. Its offically spring
Im officially canceling McCormick Monday. I got a raise.
Sooo grey goose Tuesday?????
I am seriously thinking about wearing a blanket as a cape. So when I pass out tonight the blanket might keep me warm.
she pretty much pinned my hand to her boob "on accident" for like 10 seconds before she moved. Waiting the rest of the night was just a formality.
She's high and running across rooftops. Yes we're going to end up in A&E again.
Like woke up with a dick piercing kind of drunk.
Don't worry, I'm sure your thrusting skills are on point.
Hey guys.. So I accidentally broke the front door last night
You went to pound town last night and chow town this morning. Boy you need a passport.
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
What! I said that you would fall in love? See I know better. Dark liquor makes me think everything is a dream. I barely remember saying that
Congrats, you are the first person our bartender ever met that actually needed wheeled out of a bar in a wheelchair. He said you were his hero.
I kinda realized titty fucking is purely for our enjoyment, they dont really get much out of it, except for a guy sitting on them and and a dick bouncing of their chin
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