doing a bong hit while wearing crest white strips...not such a great idea...
She uses my penis to point at the tv when we talk about the shows. I love her
Hes laying on the floorn in the bathroom telling Jesus to raise the flag
I tried to fuck this guy who I'm pretty sure has an erectile dysfunction
Don't underestimate her when she starts going by "the vodka queen"
After he finished going down on me he came up from under the covers, threw his hands into the air and shouted "take that lesbians!" and finished with "and we have dicks!"
Also I fell in love w a girl dressed as a pirate that was great at doing the limbo
Yeah i'd say someone being in the room while you're doing someone makes them eligible for fb friendship
i knew it was love when she pulled a beer out from between her boobs and offered it to me
I don't know what's worse the fact that I woke up with a clit piercing or the fact that I didn't pay for it.
i just realized I haven't been laid all summer. So sad. What a waste of a perfectly good vagina.
He was super adorable, like I wanna pinch his cheeks while I fuck him...
She passed out in my baby sister's room so we put her in one of my grandma's diapers, put a pacifier in her mouth, put her in my sister's crib and took pictures.
I told my mom that I might be hungover today so she needs to make me an omelet.. it happened and I'm happy
That was the first time ive ever slept with a girl with a q in her name
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