Yeah, it wasn't as bad as I thought. I tried not to clench and things went pretty smoothly.
i just woke up in the woods behind my house in handcuffs and a dan marino jersey ive never seen before
FYI: if you have sex in your room with the light on, we can totally see your shadows from the parking lot
Your boyfriend has good rhythm though.
her vagina looked like bernie madoff
I wish life was like dora the explorer where dancing pigs appear out of nowhere to solve your problems for you
Planned Parenthood should have gift certificates.
he wanted me to dress up like someone from lord of the rings. I dumped him.
my shit smells like andre
Ya but I plan to getting arrested more towards the end of summer
We need to do something soon. I need like 4,000 beers and a cigarette.
I'm taking a pole dancing class this morning. Can I put you down as my emergency contact? I'm NOT putting my mother
What's your opinion on eating ass? Just looking for a yes or no
Unless you count my weekly workout where I drink wine, listen to obscure/cheesy records, and pretend I'm a ballerina...no. I don't exercise.
I covered the puke with a shingle there's not many chunks. I think it will blend quickly.
Was just at a stoplight and some kid was smoking a blunt and we smiled at him and he offered to pass it between cars... Only in Rockford
Randomize
