u know ur drinking tonight lol i dont know why you try to deny it
but i dont wanna get emotional and drunk text
then give me ur phone
NEVER!!
Awkward moment #23: reasuring mom that the bf and I aren't having sex as seamen is running down my leg...
When he left he said something to the effect of "well now that I've been used..." I think he may be on to me.
I've watched enough of my roommate's imported Japanese satellite to know when the exchange students are calling me a whore.
finally remembered how I know that chick in my history class. she made and fed me ramen when I was wasted!
It felt like a sumo wrestler slapped me. With a wet hand. 8 times in a row.
Vodka and Jamison is not a mixed drink
If u ever apologize to me for "too-rough" sex again I will suspend ur all-access pass to my vagina indefinitely
He understood my need for pizza was more important than my need for sex. He's the one.
So red wine goes with eggs, right? Because that's all I have in the house to cook and the drinking options are either wine or scotch
Just remember: We don't tell our English professor about our fetishes unless she specifically asks about them.
if he ever tells me he loves me when we are sober, i am a goner. just fyi.
I love how u said nothing about the sidewalk sex but refused shower sex
Im looking at the faintest of claw marks right now. I just fell in love all over again.
she referred to her cum as “pussy butter” so needless to say we had a good night
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