i just went dwnstairs and there are 5 guys without their shirts on hugging each other. i think i should leave now
there should be a relationship option on facebook "stillllll in a relationship"
and then she yelled "im going to fuck the next guy that walks by me". so ya thats how i lost my virginity
My student's should feel privledged to see me tuesday after the amount of alcohol I consumed this weekend.
I just saw a fat chick walking across campus talking to herself and licking her lips. Diet season is scary.
Just saw a teacher from our school with his wife... Now i really know how little teachers get paid.
reason #14 for loving my boobs...just got out of a 40mph over the limit speeding ticket thru a work zone. i dont think the cop knew i even had a face
idk but i have you stored in my phone as 'guy with beard doing body shots'
Under someone's bed. Not sure whose. I think they're sleeping in it.
I'm confused are we getting high or did someone actually die?
I really like your cover photo on fb that looks cool
In case birth mom friends me back, thought I should make it less drunk looking.
Pretty sure I just noped a member of the Canadian women's hockey team on Tinder.
Accepting his friend request would be the Facebook equivalent of pity sex.
We probably shouldn't have humped each other in a stairwell for an hour. that was probably my bad
Last night I was the DD and was trying to drop off some chick I didn't know at her place. The closest thing to an address I got was "where the goldfish go."
Randomize
