There's a technique?! I just slide my tongue around
They still haven't come up with a cure for a hangover; good luck cancer.
Yeah i'm definitely friends with drunk kyle, not sober kyle.
This lady in my dui class just asked what patron was. I feel like she doesn't belong here
you can add "aspirated seaman" to the list of things your sister has been admitted to the hospital for
I just found a pubic hair on my dick that wasn't mine.
I just beer bonged. Soco and spite please get on my levvl my hair is in buns
You tried to initiate "Occupy McDonald's" when the cashier didn't give you enough ketchup.
I'm not afraid to fist fight your child if I feel he is standing in between me and some tacos.
Just so you know, a 6'7" tall gay man, with a martini in one hand and a fairy wand in the other, is not a force to be reckoned with...don't ask.
I do have a life. It just consists of making scarves and chesse straws now
I was expecting it to be of the "I am your vagina's reckoning" caliber.
He is more interested in finding his sweater than he is in having sex with me. It better be a great fucking sweater.
I wish I may, I wish I might, get some daddy dick tonight
I didn't expect the hobit to have that much sexual tension.
Randomize
