I think tonya harding is in my dwi class!
Ask her how she and Jeff Gillooly split the cats after the divorce.
Did I tell you he has dinosaur sheets?
Dude i dont know how people can complain that waterboarding is such a bad thing. I just sat through a fucking puddle of mudd show. Now thats torture
i just bought ciggarettes using my court citation as id. I've reached an all time low.
Next time we go to the river, we nominate you to flash people for free booze. Your tits are the biggest.
Was I wearing clothes when I handed you your keys. Please tell me I was wearing clothes.
thanks for paying me in special brownies...but brownies dont pay the rent...anymore.
He sent me a picture of his dick earlier so now we can all laugh at him tomorrow
I had to have the guy I went out with last night come pick me up from the hotel the next morning after I ditched him for a firefighter..don't even talk to me about a walk of shame
No. I'm laying on the floor naked. I almost made it to the shower
This could be the definition of living by yourself
I woke up surrounded by goldfish. Thank God my laptop was here too. Now I don't have to leave my bed all day.
I stared at him for a solid five minutes because he looked like what I imagine god would look like if god was a lumberjack
I'm far too poor to be letting my hookups wear my shirts home. I'm down to about a total of 8 shirts and have no intention of buying more
He broke into my house because he missed me. Then ends the relationship because I'm the needy one. Ironic much?
I think him and kristen are pretty serious now.. I dont think he cheats on her, anymore.
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