Teenaged girls are God's best work and the Devil's best tool. Remember that my friend.
I think I just made patron unclassy I bought limes at a gas station and for salt we are using gas station packets of salt
My mom is such a hoarder. I found a deer candelabrum last night, it had antlers has candle holders. It was like a redneck menorah.
after he came i started crying. just to fuck with his head.
you threatened to puke on the table cause they didnt serve eggs Benedict
You tried feeding my python vodka through a funnel. Fuck off.
i was that girl throwing up in the urinal. it was a dark moment in my life.
I gave him head while he watched NASCAR. My future flashed before my eyes.
I've reached the slutty point of no return. And it feels like multiple orgasms and coke lines
I don't not like him. It's just wierd talking to him because we both know I fucked his wife.
The point remains that this is the setup for some great stories
Or terrible, horrifying, traumatic experiences
great clearly means different things to us
They were so huge my eyes were just drawn to them. Boob gravity man.
I have the WORST cramps EVER. I think this is gods way of saying 'you're welcome, last warning. stop being a slut.'
Adderall went through the wash. Took it anyway. Wish me luck.
We're playing drunken roulette. We're taking exlax followed by shots. First person to shit themselves loses!
Randomize
