Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
those bitches were sniggering at my man-pris like they were goddesses of fashion!
...dude i pray you are quoting something, someone, anyone...
Sorry I couldn't get my dick out
i think the bruises are from the grocery store. on separate occasions. i've been spending a lot of time drunk at the market lately.
i have a vague recollection of being in the parking deck around 4 this morning, and on monday morning i was naked on the roof.
that would mean it's on tape
On my way back to his place to see his "art". Why am I sure this is going to be nothing more than his dick in a box?
It's hard to be a gentleman when a girl pauses her karaoke version of "a whole new world," and proceeds to tell the entire bar that she wants your cock in her mouth.
just thought you should know it took me an hour and a half to make soup. I had to keep laying on my kitchen floor. being 21 is hard.
Just induced vomiting to put out a carpet fire.
Everyone is cheering
Holy. Crap. I just found a hickey on my bikini line. He never got my pants off. WHO IS THIS MYSTICAL HOOKUP WIZARD?
That's fine. It's not illegal to bring ham into a museum.
I'm sure there are thousands getting dick today in the name of independence
Sad realization: so long as I use this sleep apnea machine, I will never be the little spoon!
I just used an Amazon gift card from a student to order a new vibrator....teacher of the year
This guy needs to stop asking about my feet
Speaking of dumpster fires, your ex tried to add me on Facebook
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