so I woke up and found tortilla in my belly button
my love horoscope just told me to "say it in frosting" should i take this literally?? i think yes.
Also, at 1:30 I emailed myself saying, "are you there Margaret? It's me, god"
I brought his matress to the living room we're laying on it listening to rick james drinking vodka
I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL?
He is like a dragon that makes me want to spread my butt cheeks, so he can fill me with hot fire.
So, I'm drinking, and I put my head down in the table. The cat jumped up to check on me, I have a cat sober monitor.
I have a LOT of reasons to worry about radical feminists taking my lady balls, frankly. A lot.
The only flat surface we had was a cheez it box so we snorted the blow off of that. Rock bottom really isn't that bad.
I never forget a pussy, even blackout me gives me that memory.
but, alas, I am not the lady in the streets. I'm simply the freak in the sheets.
Excuse me while I take my birth control pill for today to prevent getting pregnant from hearing about your sex life
OMG WE ARE UP TO THREE MINORS WORKING HERE. I AM NOT READY FOR THIS MID LIFE CRISIS.
i found a picture from last night of you sat on the floor naked, covered in butter and crying. care to explain?
I was hoping you could tell me..
I'll be naked. By 11. Then arrested. Drunk tank adventures
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