Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
Conclusion from last night: Sometimes being classy isn't as fun as making out with a guy on a pooltable in a bar. Happy birthday, Canada.
I'll probably regret it tomorrow. But right now, accepting this $2000 credit card so that I can finance booty calls from across the united states sounds like a golden idea.
What color suit is the proper "i banged the bride" attire?
I'm convinced my penis is the only thing holding this relationship together.
he came in the room wearing gloves & rapping while eating a corndog
knight in shining armor
in the middle of getting head my cat meowed. she looked up , meowed back, and then continued giving me head.
I've already dropped her on the ground of a crowded bar dancing , been incoherent drunk to the point i couldn't speak and came within 2 seconds all on separate evenings so at this point she should know what I'm about
He started french braiding my hair while I was blowing him. The question is not why, but how.
My grandma just invited me to gate crash a funeral for the free food. Priorities.
So I thought you might like to hear how I went to sams club to print some pictures and suddenly there was 20 pictures of your dick and my snatch on the screen
Just dropped the most perfectly rolled joint into the toilet I just finished taking a shit in, hadn't even had time to flush, 5 second rule?
No!
Hey how're your balls?
Don't ever let me helicopter again.
Told a guy at the bar I was hurricane evacuees with no place to stay. Just woke up at his place. God bless Florence
she's 6'2. you bet your ass i slept with her.
Randomize
