Hannah Montana > iCarly
I'm disregarding that text and your testicles entirely
you were so high that you made a 14 page PowerPoint on why Santa would beat Peter pan in a fight.
and I must say, you were very persuasive
He just called me juicy booty via text message.
I would call you but I don't feel like these hands belong to me.
To do list: put blue gatorade in a windex spray bottle. spray it into my mouth in public so people think i'm drinking windex.
I was fucking trucked by the swat team last night on State Street after UK won. But I got a picture with the guy afterwards so I forgive him
so I am that guy with the red solo cup in class. someone has to step it up.
I have the relationship skills of Miley Cyrus and I could've said this was a bad idea
For not really liking Christmas, I have an astounding amount of holiday-themed lingerie
Apparently nothing brings out sympathy in a barista like asking if they have a hangover special
All I remember is while we were making out M.A.A.D City came on so I pushed him off of me so I could rap along.
No. DON'T DO IT. Friends don't let friends fuck clowns.
Btw, I feel the need to make sure we have no misunderstanding about this. So here goes. I'll happily mess around with you again. However, I probably won't do it while you're dressed like a creepy clown. Or any clown.
I need to wash the frat house off of me
I feel awful. The bartender added me on Facebook and there's chips all over the bathroom floor
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