what is TOTES MCGOATS in spanish?
She said she didn't want to have sex because she was so torn up about "this whole NBC thing."
I can't believe I had to convince you to not drink butter.
I'm pretty sure my moms getting nailed in the bathroom right now while I'm chaperoning. God damn it.
I was to the point where my socks were drenched in ranch dressing
On our way there. Drinking my beer out of a coffee pot. Cuz it's my bday
Add caroling to the list of things we need to do in an elevator
You know you're fucked up when you decide to pour fireball whiskey in your vegetable beef soup
He's like all my past boyfriends wrapped up into one fuck up. It's enjoyable to watch.
So I bet a guy he could drink two irish car bombs faster than me and I lost. now he gets to name our first son. sory.
If you're going to do that you're going to need a pleather suit.
Wanna see if we can get cut off at bdubs again? The same hipster manager that is younger than us is working again
woke up to find a case of beer in the oven and a random puppy in the house...guess i had a party last night?
I like to make sure they know it's casual by giving then a high five after sex
You where banging on the wall asking us where we hid the door...you then crawled under the deck thinking you'd be safe. I told you to eat the nachos before the party...I told you.....
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