My parents took my cat for a ride in the car. Second weekend in a row. They think its fun. Dear God
He introduced her to the DMA meeting by saying: in the past few years i've never seen someone work so hard for so little success
if reincarnation is for serious, i better be a guy in my next life
with a huge shlong
massive. i wanna make bitches cry
I just typed 14 shots of Smirnoff into my calorie count toolbar. Then typed pole dancing 1.5hrs into the calorie burner search. Should break even.
I made popcorn. Partly so the room doesn't smell like sex, and partly to apologize for the things you saw when you walked in...
just tried to pee in the sink at wendys...need to stop letting my drunk habits get into my sober life
you know it's gonna be a good 4/20 when you start saving up for it in january.
I have full custody of my vagina however you are granted visiting hours
Really? I thought your parents stopped loving you when you drunkenly fell through the ceiling...
Kellie accidentally ran into the car with two teenagers making out. made a big thud. there was a loud scream and she was gone...haven't seen her since
I mean I only got hit in the ass with ONE firework
don't worry, i'm not mad. i'm just angry. and furious. and about to set your ass on fire.
Sooooooo, can scratch getting a pelvic exam by a man dressed as Woody from Toy Story off my list.
You need to write an essay about this experience.
He was even wearing the hat.
We bird danced in front of the bird cages for 20 minutes. I think it was our way of being like fuck you guys you're in a cage and we're on summer break.
i out mim tonsoeep
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