you sent me the whole alphabet, one letter a text. it took 15 minutes to read them all
i need a wealthy benefactor or a cocktail job. or to start stripping. or kill myself. whatever.
Sometimes I worry for your future but then I remember how big your boobs are.
his penis is PERFECT
I want to put it in a shoebox and place cottonbls around it to protect it from any harm
or knit it little hat
she said she was gay. i said prove it. she said "ok i wont fuck you"
There is nacho cheese and blood everywhere.
If this week is any indication of my life here I've got to get out ASAP. My liver can't hack it.
We got kicked out of the ice rink last night for drinking and checking strangers... but they let us keep the beer
Having a man strip on demand was an awesome way to start birthday. What more could a girl ask for? U the best!
So I found a skull ring inside me this morning. I'm assuming its yours, so I'll leave it in my mailbox for you - it looks expensive.
If he thinks that that is an acceptable way to ask me out he is out his goddamn ginger mindddddd.
For once I am not in the mood. My vagina is good with life at the moment.
The apocalypse has arrived.
I only had ten dollars. So leave it to Katie to somehow makeout with the bartender, on his shift mind you, and get free drinks.
We were both too drunk to drive home. So we did it in the coat closet and then I walked home. 20/20 hindsight: Could have both walked to my apartment and then had sex there.
Thanks to a bad fart decision during a production meeting, I am now on my way to Target to buy new pants. How is your day?
Randomize