So when does "going out for one drink" = giving some guy an HJ on the sidewalk?!?
After she threw up on my floor she started singing "this is why I'm hot."
We were playing flip cup on the nice dining room table. Losing team had to shamwow the table in between rounds
so I finished the entire bottle...next thing I know, it's 8 am and I wake up on the fucking beach in the low tide with a family standing about 30 feet from me just staring.
It was either a cute kinda butch tomgirl or a really fem guy. Either way, I made out with it. Bisexuality, my best friend.
so... the fat chick just walked over, shook my hand, then introduced herself as "versatile". shoot me now.
The front desk girl just had that condescending welcome-home-from-your-walk-of-shame face on
It was probably because you set your bra on the couter while you found your ID...
I think I ruined his life by managing to get his initiation nickname for his frat to be "Whiskey Dick" but I still wish herpes on him and his fugly new girlfriend.
i think i just asked a donut if it was ok
I made out with about ten people last night. And four of them were just on the way to my car from the bar. And one was my roommate.
just remember the most important rule of taking psychedelics: monsters can't get through blankets
My little sister just helped me edit my nudes so that's how my night is going
It was great. Somehow, sleeping with her sister cured everything!
THIS IS NOT A LAUGHING MATTER, CAITLIN. MY PARENTS ARE FUCKING. LOUDLY.
there is a tent in the living room. its a vip tent room. i want in.
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