this guy jus got head in a gas station bathroom from this fat chick with one leg
gross dude. was the guy blacked out drunk or something?
yeah and it only cost me 6 dollars
i'm not going because i feel like it's just gunna be a "this is your life" who i banged this years addition
I wish my period boobs were my regular boobs.
There are a bunch of guys at the door looking for the guy you brought back to the condo...pretended not to speak English. You're welcome.
I broke his nose at the bar and he still went home with me.
He's so young, I keep getting a mental image of him in footie pajamas. It's cute but it's wrong. Or is it?
Everything's fine I'm just stoned and my pillows are too soft.
he broke off your car antennae to use as a walking stick before he smoked because he claimed to lack the facial strength needed to open his eyes when he's high
Think of where it's been though. That Dr. Suess book, "Oh the Places You'll go" was written for his penis.
You played "let it burn" by usher 28 times, knocked over the 36 gallon fish tank, and passed out in the kitchen. Yeah...That drunk.
Carpeing THE FUCK out of that diem
Please send me a thumbs up pic afterwards. No homo. After you've redressed and are heading for the walk of shame out of course
well I tackled her when she was going to go upstairs because I was convinced that the house was haunted. You gotta stick together in horror movies.
It happened to me once. But i washed off in a duck pond and walked home naked.
Woke up in a cemetery. Puked in front a funeral ceremony that was going on.
Randomize
