don't get me wrong, i like my boss a lot, but not enough to not bang his daughter
my room smells like sperm. sweet.
i found your underwear in my bra... i dont even remember how this happened.
shit. all i remember is the look on your moms face.
best googles of the semester: toe fucking, purpose of two nostrils, human tail. with pictures
You pulled the fire alarm because you had to shit and there was someone in the bathroom. you said you needed privacy
Pretty sure the girl next to me in Chipotle just came out to her mom.
pretty sure the dicks i sucked were punishment enough
She's on her way over to shave my year round sweater vest into a festive argyle sweater vest. Keeper?
We're not piercing ourselves today.
If I had an Australian accent I'd be unstoppable. Teach me how you talk
Currently sifting through all the dick pics and nudes for a picture of my dad and I to post on social media for Father's Day...
My party ended early and I have a mountain of shrimp and weed
Sex on the trampoline with your two best friends cheering you on: PRICELESS.
HE’S PUKING UP BLOOD
okay all good I mistook strawberita for blood...
Still had our rainbow strip poker new years tradition. End of night we were only wearing mask.
Did you get the usual surprise pics from the strange straight you like to sprinkle in.
Randomize
