where are you?
in the room with the baby pig
k im coming soon
I think I'm going to go home and read The Bible.
I spent a large portion of the night trying unsuccessfully to keep hayley (who was wearing a dress and no underwear) from doing handstands, but yea it was fun. the boys had fun
He was legit dry humping me to the sportscenter theme song, awkward i think SO.
You have to stop getting hammered and preaching about that mission trip to Haiti.
I mostly enjoyed dancing with him because his boner was scratching my bug bites.
Sometimes familiar penis is best. Its like comfort food for your vagina.
how many thumbs am i supposed to have at one time
you found the shrooms didnt you
That chick who made out with a door is here. Want her number??
Getting a vibrator would be like waving the white flag of surrender in this war against my vagina and its hormone army.
Can you bring me the toilet please
Thats just a parental red flag. They have been brainwashed. Lets baptize them into the church of PBR
I am seriously only coming over if there are McNuggets. I want 10 bitch. Honey mustard.
You tried crawling through the apartment window instead of going through the wide open door next to it
I just texted him from the other room to come have sex with me-stress relieved
You are such a millennial
Randomize
