It really wasn't that bad. Well, it was pretty bad, but only in 3 second bursts.
Memo to self- delete texts about butt sex from you before giving my mom my old phone to use.
...there is blood under my fingernails.
...I hope my roomates are okay.
It's like I paid NJ Transit $33 to suck his dick and go home. Fuck that.
It was her first time with a girl so I put on my tegan and Sara playlist to really get the full experience.
I feel like I got hit by a truck. Or a baby dinosaur. One of them ran over my body and then stuck me in a blender of fire and storm clouds
My mouth taste like pussy and my dad noticed. Hahahaha
Steve, that episode of cops where your dealer rear-ended that family is on again.
If that orgasm indicates how the rest of the year is going to go, I need to buy rain boots.
I need to be put in a corner surrounded by pamphlets of stds and babies
Strip Simon Says: DO IT
im questioning your sanity while also accepting your reality
But what we lack in money, we make up for in dry humor and drugs
Please explain the hospital band on my wrist.
I couldnt face her after that wonderful, terrible blowjob. Made a rope out of towels and climbed out her bathroom window.
Randomize
